So it happened. I turned 32 at the end of October. The truth is this, My 30s have been less scary than I thought they were when I was in my 20s – I have always had a terrible concept of time, so to me, getting older can be particularly scary if I let my mind go there.
Just before I hit 30, I was newly single and pretty sure life was running out. But then something happened, I was hit by what felt like a natural, overwhelming feeling of believing I’m supposed to be 30 and single. That’s it – I just felt it.
That feeling has stayed with me. I haven’t wavered too much.
That said, the day before my birthday I did experience the possibly inevitable “omg I’m going to be 32 and I’ve still not met anyone”. All of a sudden it hit me that 32 is actually a serious adult age. Maybe that’s it, maybe I just realised I’m an adult. Either way, it didn’t make me sad; I just had a moment.
Before my birthday, I made a list. A list of 32 lessons I wanted my 32 year old self to know, to remember as I move through new chapters. I decided to share the list with you – as you will see, there is quite a mixture of messages to myself:
Turn to your younger self more often, picture her. She can guide you more than you give her credit for.
Work on the difficult relationships in your life. Keep yourself as safe as you know how, but try something.
Drink more water.
Go on a trip abroad alone.
Meeting the right person does not equal a small life or settling – not the kind of love you’ve worked for.
Paying a ridiculous amount for spin classes every month IS worth it for you.
When you feel sad, go to spin.
Having children won’t give you the childhood you never had.
Christmas isn’t so bad.
Being happy and single is better than being OK & in a relationship, no matter what anyone says.
People will either judge you, not care or cheer-lead you. Appreciate all as a lesson, but especially the cheerleaders.
Your mind-set is your responsibility
Don’t go to a spin class on the first day of your period. dear god, never again.
Don’t be afraid of your 40s, Jennifer Aniston said they are great.
Book tickets to go to the 2020 Westlife tour in Dublin again – that’s the kind of fun and play we are talking about
See Nan more.
Sometimes no one is right or wrong.
Not all friendships last forever.
A real connection isn’t easy to find – do not rush it.
Long distance friendship does not mean it won’t last (Hey Rachy and Lori-Ann!)
When you remember that cringey thing, just feel it a second, don’t bury it too quickly, it comes back stronger.
Own where you come from, you’ve tried this year, but could you say the words out loud yet?
Start before you are ready.
You have never run out of money so far.
Don’t always trust your first impression – most people are nice!
Get your nails done and buy flowers more – they both make you feel good.
Practice meditation for at least five minutes a day.
Send love to anyone that has hurt you – it’s so much easier.
You don’t have to be strong all the time.
See Lewis Capaldi live.
Go so big in work – fall, get back up, try new things, don’t worry, don’t stop.
I adored writing this list. I definitely won’t be waiting for birthdays to do this again and will be sure to keep reviewing and re-visiting. Having an idea of where you have come from, who you are and what your tomorrow looks like is going to put you in a position to grow where you need to, and put you on a path to rise up and create the life you want.
It’s not all simple, it’s not easy and things will get in the way. That’s life. I just want to have the best time I possibly can. What about you?
Carly Ann xx
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