In conversation with:
Natalie Carranceja

Posted on 2nd Mar 2020 by

Natalie is a Confidence Expert and NLP Coach with a fierce love for understanding the subconscious mind. Inside her successful global coaching practice, Natalie helps women confidently master their emotions, communication and decision making, so they can experience bliss, joy and contentment within their relationships. Natalie is the creator of The Trifecta of Confidence, and uses this unique coaching model to help you set the stage for sustainable and unimaginable confidence, that allows you to be the woman you desire to be inside you relationship and throughout your whole life.

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“Take ownership of your own happiness and get very clear on your own unique meaning of HAPPY.”

I have decided to bring back my 10 Happy Questions interview. I am slightly obsessed with what makes us feel good, so what better way to explore happiness than to ask the people I admire most. It was a no brainer when it came to who I would ask first…

Natalie and I met through the power of instagram. We have regular catch ups, we share our wins and we share our struggles. We all need that right?!

It’s fair to say, we do similar work – and the thing I want to point out, is how we support each other. In this world, we have been conditioned to compare and despair. A common mind-set block is the idea there is not enough for everyone. It’s simply not true – and besides, life is a lot more fun when you surround yourself with Cheerleaders!

Below; Natalie outlines what happiness means to her, suggests a song to lift you up, advice for when you are feeling sad and what she considers a must-read for us all. I hope you enjoy reading as much as I have!

1) what does Happiness mean to you?

I love this question because everyone’s answer is so beautifully unique. To me, Happiness means being content with the polarities we experience in life. It’s in the sense of accomplishment you feel when you overcome your fear. It’s in the love you feel when you your partner brings you a coffee in the morning. It’s the pride you feel when you have finally finished a project you’ve been working on. It’s the deep self love you feel when you’ve been willing and open to sit with your sadness or guilt. When we are really comfortable and accepting of the ups and downs, we experience happiness. 

2) What makes you happy?

You know, I’ve been back and forth with this recently. I used to be really judgemental of myself when admitting what makes me happy, and I’ve witnessed how that’s impacted me and my own inner confidence. So I’ve really allowed myself to just own it and say it loudly. 

I LOVE the “mundane” things in life so much, like going for walks by the frozen lake near my home, staying in with my hubs and watching back-to-back netflix true crime doco’s, having a glass of wine with my closest friends or cleaning my bathroom (seriously, I am SO happy with a clean bathroom)! 

Then there’s running my coaching practice. I love watching my clients become witness to their own capabilities, I love holding space for them while they release such powerful yet stagnant emotions and I love seeing them have the most insane breakthroughs that allow them to have a deep and loving human-to-human connection, with others AND themselves. This work makes me so happy and I love how it makes ME feel too.

Honestly, I think what makes me most happy is creating incredible memories for myself and those around me.

Also – beaches. The sun and sand makes me extremely happy. 

Also also – I loooooove talking and sharing with women who are open to all kinds of concepts and ideas!

Ok, I’ll stop now.

3) What’s 3 things you do to take care of your wellbeing?

I set boundaries around my personal and work life. This has been fundamental for sustaining my own wellbeing, especially working for myself and having an online business.

Pleasure first, ALWAYS. We think that pleasure should be a reward AFTER we have completed the “to do list” or taken care of everyone else. I truly believe we have to flip this. When I make sure my cup is filled first, I am a better human being not only for myself, but also for others.

Getting outside! Environment is everything to me. I like to make sure my day contains a variety of different environments, from sitting in my office, going to a barre class or getting outside in the mountains. Oh man, fresh air can shift your mindset in an instant (especially in these wintery snowy temperatures!)

4) What would you say to someone that is going through a tough time at the moment?

Its OK to feel all the emotions you’re experiencing right now. It does feel hard, it does feel challenging and at times it feels suffocating, but remind yourself that this is an experience, and as with all experiences, they will pass. It’s crucial that right now you be a witness to the situation and be the observer, and encourage yourself to stay rather than run. This might very well the trigger that catapults you into growth that you had no idea you desired. Witness it all with an open heart, and when you feel ready ask yourself “what am I learning here that will add value to my future?”, and allow that lesson to guide you out of the situation. Only when you’re ready. 

You’re never alone, and you can reach out and ask for help in any given moment.

5) What makes you feel better when you’re sad?

I am a talker. When I am sad, I have a deep inner conversation with myself, and then when I’ve processed, I then take the conversation to someone close to me. I do cry a lot, and I find this is such a natural release of sadness for me, and I feel so much better when I just let it out. I also find tapping into happy and joyful memories can lessen the intensity of the sadness I am experiencing. 

6) What song makes you happy?

September by Earth Wind and Fire. Gets me going every time!!

7) what’s the best bit of advice you have ever been given?

Eeek, I have two bits…

Forgiveness isn’t for the other person, it’s for you, so you can let go and move on emotionally and energetically. 

Surrender and let go, it will save you so much time.

8) What book should everyone read?

“The Surrender Experiment” – Michael A Singer.

9) What is one thing you like about yourself?

My ability to make other people see and be a witness to their own incredible capabilities. 

10) What do people need to know about happiness?

You create it. No one can make you feel happy, its an inside job. Take ownership of your own happiness and get very clear on your own unique meaning of HAPPY.

As usual, I come away from reading a 10 Happy questions interview with a new book on my list. Michael Singer’s ‘The Untethered Soul’ is one of my favourites. Thank you for the recommendation!

I have to say, I could not agreed more with Natalie when she says “take ownership of your own happiness” – for me, my whole life changed when I realised our happiness sits in our own hands.

To learn more follow Natalie on instagram @natalie_carranceja_coaching or tune into her podcast The Choosing Confidence Podcast.

Tag myself (@the_happy_diary_) to let me know your key take-aways!! & be sure to let me know who you want me to interview next!

Carly Ann xx

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